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The accountant had just read the story from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
The accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"

A Martian lands to plunder pillage and from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, "I'm a Martian just arrived from the other side of the galaxy. We're here to destroy your civilisation, pillage and burn. What do you think about that?" The owner replies, "I don't have an opinion. I'm a chartered accountant."

A businessman hires a private detective to from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
A businessman hires a private detective to find a missing accountant. The detective tells him that he needs a description and asks a few questions. "Was he tall or was he short?" The businessman replies, "Both!"

A businessman tells his friend that his from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks, "Didn't your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?" The businessman replies, "That's the accountant we're looking for."

Whats a shy and retiring accountantAn accountant from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
What's a shy and retiring accountant? An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring.

Who was the first accountantAdam He got from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
Who was the first accountant? Adam. He got interested in figures, turned the first leaf, made the first entry, lost interest after withdrawal, buggered up the monthly accounts and raised the first liability.

Laws of Accounting Trial balances dont Bank from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
Laws of Accounting 1. Trial balances don't 2. Bank reconciliations never do 3. Working Capital does not 4. Return on Investments never will

How many cost accountants does it take from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb? Hmmm........I'll just do a few numbers and get back to you

How many auditors does it take to from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb? How many did it take last year?

Why did he cross backSo he could from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
Why did he cross back? So he could charge the client for travel expenses.

Why did the auditor cross the roadBecause from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
Why did the auditor cross the road? Because he looked in the file and that's what they did last year.

What does FCPA stand forFinally Caught Pinching from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
What does FCPA stand for? Finally Caught Pinching the Assets

What does CPA stand forCant Produce Anything from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
What does CPA stand for? Can't Produce Anything

What would Economics be without assumptionsAccounting Accountant from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
What would Economics be without assumptions? Accounting

How do you know when an accountants from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
How do you know when an accountant's on holidays? He doesn't wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30.

Why do accountants get excited on SaturdaysThey from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays? They can wear casual clothes to work

When do accountants laugh out loudWhen somebody from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
When do accountants laugh out loud? When somebody asks for a raise

How can you tell when the Chief from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
How can you tell when the Chief Accountant is getting soft? When he actually listens to Marketing before saying No

What do you call an accountant without from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet? Lost

There are three kinds of accountants in from Flashcomment Accountant jokes Jokes
There are three kinds of accountants in the world. Those who can count and those who can't.